Music

Looking At Life




Black & White World

The photographs are faded
The people are long gone
From the windy English beaches
Family weddings and so on
We try to freeze the moments
But they’re not what they seem
They drift from being real
To feeling like a dream

I remember the cars
I remember the clothes (and the girl)
I remember life
In a black and white world

TVs the size of houses
That always seemed to fail
Just as your favorite cowboy
Was about to hit the trail
Tomorrow was a promise
We hoped that time would keep
Any disappointment cured
By a good night’s sleep

I remember the cars
I remember the clothes (and the girl)
I remember life
In a black and white world

Fumbling under blouses
As only a young boy can
Desperately trying to make
The boy into a man
We grew up believing
Every oyster grew a pearl
I remember life
In a black and white world
I remember life
In a black and white world

Now the girl cries in the mirror
For everything life steals
Nothing that she sees
Matches what she feels
And no one takes your picture
Standing by the grave
There’s nothing of this moment
Anybody wants to save

I remember the cars
I remember the clothes (and the girl)
I remember life
In a black and white world

 

The Beautiful Prison

Did someone buy you flowers
On Valentine’s Day
Did someone say I love you
Then just walk away
It wasn’t me but I apologize
For all the games we play
In the beautiful…the beautiful prison
In the beautiful…the beautiful prison

Were you told the path was easy
Looking like you do
Were you told the doors would open
Like magic for the few
It wasn’t me but I apologize
Some get more than they are due
In the beautiful…the beautiful prison
In the beautiful…the beautiful prison

We serve our time
We don’t know how long
What was the crime
What did we do wrong
What did we do wrong

Did someone try to tell you
The roads are all dead ends
And the worst of enemies
Can arrive disguised as friends
It wasn’t me but I apologize
No time to make amends
In the beautiful…the beautiful prison
In the beautiful…the beautiful prison

Think of all the times you promised
Your heart to anyone
Who’d give your tired body
A moment in the sun
It wasn’t me but I apologize
For all the damage done
In the beautiful…the beautiful prison
In the beautiful…the beautiful prison

No bars of steel
Only bars of sky
To hold us here
Always asking why
Always asking why

Did someone buy you flowers
On Valentine’s Day
Did someone say I love you
Then just walk away
It wasn’t me but I apologize
For all the games we play
In the beautiful…the beautiful prison
In the beautiful…the beautiful prison

 

I Know You’re There

(CONVERSATIONEM MORTEM)

Call me a loser
I’ve heard it all before
You’re no better than that wolf
Howling at my door
Oh I…I know you’re there
But I just don’t care

Say what you will
They’re only words
I raise my hand and they
Scatter like birds
Oh I…I know you’re there
But I just don’t care

I don’t care for your stories
I don’t care if they’re true
I don’t live on past glories
I’m not you

Sticks and stones
You know the rest
Even your names
Are second best
Oh I…I know you’re there
But I just don’t care

Call me a failure
If it makes you feel good
Your anger’s not real
It don’t live in the blood
Oh I…I know you’re there
But I just don’t care

I thought that I was dying
Now I think that I might live
No use sitting and crying
I got more to give

Call me a fool
If that’s what it takes
But don’t think that makes up for
All of your mistakes
Oh I…I know you’re there
But I just don’t care

 

Looking At Life

Looking at life
Through the bottom of a glass
The painless way
To help time pass
More behind me than what lies ahead
Nothing to say that’s not been said
No fear of death when you’re already dead
And just looking at life

Looking at life
Where I used to live it
Whatever you want
I’m unable to give it
Once I might have won your heart
Maybe back there at the start
Long before the whole thing fell apart
And left us looking at life

Looking at life
In its cold gray eyes
No sign of fear
Or compromise
I can’t see things the way I’m told to do
No right or wrong just points of view
And the young see the old as if it’s the new
When they’re looking at life

Looking at life
Looking back at the arc
I don’t really care
If I left my mark
Through open fingers sand slips away
What is truly ours nobody can say
The desert takes it all back one day
You’re left looking at life

Looking at life
Through the bottom of a glass
The painless way
To help time pass
More behind me than what lies ahead
Nothing to say that’s not been said
No fear of death when you’re already dead
And just looking at life

Just looking at life
Just looking at life
Looking at life
Looking at life
Looking at life

 

Wishing Ground

I’m tired
I can’t tell you all the pain that I feel
All I know
(All I know)
Is this pain is real

I’m learning
Learning all the world’s give and takes
All I know
(All I know)
Is I made mistakes

Oh I’ll never
Learn what makes this world go round
All I know
(All I know)
Is the wishing ground

I’m listening
Listening to the dreams of the crowd
All I know
(All I know)
Is silence talks so loud

I remember
When love was not a tired word
All I know
(All I know)
The heart is quite absurd

Oh I’ll never
Learn what makes this world go round
All I know
(All I know)
Is the wishing ground

I’m walking
I’m walking where no feet have ever trod
All I know
(All I know)
Is I see no god

 

A Short Story

(For Raymond Carver, 1938 – 1988)

Black coffee and a shot of Jack
In the cup holder
A chip the size of the moon
On his shoulder
His foot down hard
On the floor of his pickup truck
Driving through the night
To anywhere with better luck

She gave the best years
Of her life to that loser
Regretting the very moment
He would see her and choose her
She knows she waited
Too long to walk away
Now she’s driving free
Into come what may

He’s a washed-up rock ‘n’ roller
She’s a one-time beauty queen
Now their faces are the roadmaps
To the sorrows that they’ve seen
Their windshield wipers wash away
The miles beneath their wheels
If you’ve never had a dream destroyed
You can’t know how it feels

They met where the freeway
Drops down to the street
At the corner of Hope and Baltimore
Was it always written
That these two should meet
And find what they were looking for
And find what they were looking for

They saw each other
A breath too late
Didn’t see the future
Crashing head-on with fate
Thrown like rag dolls
In the gutter they lay
Like lovers entwined
At the break of day

They met where the freeway
Drops down to the street
At the corner of Hope and Baltimore
Was it always written
That these two should meet
And find what they were looking for
And find what they were looking for

 

Never Came To Be

Like lonely pioneers
In the human zoo
We tried to find the limits
Of this thing called me and you
Were we just repeating
The same old midnight lies
The same old sordid story
I love you implies

Such a shame to see
It never came to be
Tell me are there times
When you think of me

I still see you sitting
On the wall by the school
Watching a teenage Romeo
Play the teenage fool
In the heat of the summer
Secrets were revealed
You and me making love
In a sun-drenched field

Such a shame to see
It never came to be
Tell me are there times
When you think of me

We moved in together
Ah…the perfect pair
That’s what everybody said
But everybody wasn’t there
A fortress made of flesh
Immune to attack
But once we looked outside
There was no going back

Such a shame to see
It never came to be
Tell me are there times
When you think of me

Is there a room in your mind
A door that I walk through
Do I visit you at times
You least expect me to

That winter in England
I see it so well
Each one of us trying
To put the other through hell
I remember living
Taking over from play
You and me growing up
But growing away

Such a shame to see
It never came to be
Tell me are there times
When you think of me
Tell me are there times
When you think of me

Clothed in all its glory
Or naked in the rain
I’ve seen life’s beauty frequently
Oh I cannot complain
Lonely nights – a few
But the crazy nights were many
But all these selfish thoughts
Well they’re not worth a penny

Such a shame to see
It never came to be
Tell me are there times
When you think of me
Tell me are there times
When you think of me

 

When The Money Runs Out

You walk a mile in another man’s shoes
When the money runs out
Every song you sing
It sounds like the blues
When the money runs out
Reality hits but it doesn’t hurt
No one knows what you’re laughing about
When the money runs out

You think of how it used to be
When the money runs out
You wonder how it all came so easily
When the money runs out
You had it good for far too long
Now you whisper you don’t shout
When the money runs out

It came and it went
It ran through your fingers
The memory lingers
Of breaking the rules
It came and it went
It flowed like a river
You were a giver
The Pied Piper of fools

You get to see who you really are
When the money runs out
It’s suddenly clear
You’ve not come very far
When the money runs out
You never stopped to think ahead
Never planned to do without
When the money runs out

When the money runs out
When the money runs out
It came and it went
It ran through your fingers
The memory lingers
Of breaking the rules
It came and it went
It flowed like a river
You were a giver
The Pied Piper of fools

Tired mask finally falls away
When the money runs out
Life is no longer a role you play
When the money runs out
But through it all you had her smile
True love is never in doubt
When the money runs out

 

The Empty Hours

Darkness steals all signs of light
Days give in to endless night
Sadness spreads like wild flowers
And we find ourselves here
In the empty hours

Nobody said it would go so fast
Seems that life is not designed to last
From dirty streets to ivory towers
We find ourselves here
In the empty hours

We loved and lost and loved again
The other women and the other men
Passions brief as summer showers
And we find ourselves here
In the empty hours

Looking back we can’t explain
Why we caused each other pain
Why love so sweet so often sours
And we find ourselves here
In the empty hours

All the hurt comes home at last
Dreams mistaken for the past
We hunger for what time devours
And we find ourselves here
In the empty hours

I cannot trust what I’ll say next
For reasons dark and so complex
The human heart gives up its powers
And we find ourselves here
In the empty hours

See What Time Has Done


See What Time Has Done

We are the ones
Who fought against the past
We are the ones
Who believed the dream could last

Now we’re on the run
Now we’re on the run
See what time has done

We are the ones
Who marched to a different drum
We are the ones
Blew the old to kingdom come

See what time has done
To the visions of our youth
We never meant to lie
We just never faced the truth
We never meant to lie
We just never faced the truth

We are the ones
Who rewrote all the rules
We are the ones
Who now sometimes look like fools

From the album beneath a flagless moon, 2012

In Broken Sleep

In broken sleep we love again
like the present is the past
Our bodies and our hearts now know
the fire that cannot last
Love and time are enemies
and both are on the loose
The only thing worth fighting for
is the momentary truce
The momentary truce babe
The momentary truce
In broken sleep we see ourselves
and watch through different eyes
As strangers who we barely know
begin to materialize
Soft hellos are spoken
The pleasantries are said
I haven’t seen you for so long
I thought that you were dead
I thought that you were dead babe
I thought that you were dead
In broken sleep we wonder what
it’s like to never wake
But soon enough we see the road
that we all someday take
The darkness fills our minds with things
we should not contemplate
We have no way of knowing
if it’s early or it’s late
it’s early or it’s late babe
Early or it’s late
So in broken sleep we love again
like the present is the past
Our bodies and our hearts now know
the fire that cannot last
Love and time are enemies
and both are on the loose
The only thing worth fighting for
is the momentary truce
The momentary truce babe
The momentary truce

From the album JanuaryRising, 2013

The Wasted Years

Take these things I possess
I know I’ll get by with less
That’s all I’ve learned I guess
Through the wasted years

I don’t know right from wrong
I don’t know weak from strong
Just know I’ve been silent too long
Through the wasted years

My heart just spoke
Like a dam just broke

Torn between east and west
Failing each and every test
Not knowing which direction’s best
Through the wasted years

I called you from Singapore
With feelings you had no use for
Hear the echo of that closing door
Through the wasted years

My heart just spoke
Like a dam just broke
My heart just spoke

Living like a weekend guest
Guessing where I’d come to rest
All my mail arrived addressed
To the wasted years

I have seen the other side
Where the broken hearts collide
God knows what kept me whole inside
Through the wasted years
I have seen the other side
Where the broken hearts collide
God knows what kept me whole inside
Through the wasted years
Through the wasted years

From the album Raised In Vain, 2006

If The Blues Ever Ends

Go on without me I’m staying here
Where the skies are still blue and the waters run clear
I’ve been dreaming of this thirty years or more
With a pain in my heart that I bought one time in a record store

Didn’t see it coming just music I thought
But the blues took my soul and I spent my life caught
I’ve still got the blues but they’re worth nothing more
Than this pain in my heart that I bought one time in a record store
Mississippi John Hurt – Big Joe Williams and friends
Can you come back and tell me if the blues ever ends

Small town kid nowhere to run
Found a home in these voices baked in the sun
Voices soaked in the dreams of the poor
Made this pain in my heart that I bought one time in a record store
Mississippi John Hurt – Robert Johnson and friends
Can you come back and tell me if the blues ever ends

They sang about a different life
Where the master was god and could borrow your wife
I can’t claim I was ever whipped raw
Just got this pain in my heart that I bought one time in a record store

Go on without me I’m staying here
Where the skies are still blue and the waters run clear
I’ve been dreaming of this thirty years or more
With a pain in my heart that I bought one time in a record store
Mississippi John Hurt – John Lee Hooker and friends
Can you come back and tell me if the blues ever ends
Can you come back and tell me if the blues ever ends

from the album The Story Of It All, 2014

Crawling Blues

I put my faith in Jesus
For a minute or two
I was told he walked on water but he never came through
So I put my faith in his father
And the stories of old
Then I saw his disciples chasing fame and gold

Ah we all get there
We all get there some day
But sometimes it feels like you’re crawling all the way

I put my faith in the devil
We met at the crossroads one night
But I couldn’t read his offer I needed a little more light
So I put my faith in a woman
My best wasn’t good enough
Seems she met the devil too and they fell in love

I put my faith in a bottle
Put my faith in alcohol
I remember I saw all the answers but I can’t recall
So I put my faith in the future
And the sound of distant drums
But I wasted all my time ‘cause tomorrow never comes

So I put my faith in nothing
Nothing left for me to do
But now I know for certain nothing is true

from the album Arcana (The Lost Songs), 2017

The Way Of The Road

For Bob Dylan

I’m sitting in this diner with thoughts of what was
I’m thinking of leaving but I don’t because
I hear the jukebox reload
I guess all I can say is that’s the way of the road

Don’t know where I’m going don’t know where I’ve been
I’m out here waiting for my life to begin
Free from this heavy load
I guess all I can say is that’s the way of the road
I guess all I can say is that’s the way of the road

This broken old voice and the words it sings
These tired fingers on silver strings
Every song a seed we sowed
I guess all I can say is that’s the way of the road

They say that we’re dying and it’s probably true
It’s all that you’ve known what else can you do
You lived your whole life by the code
I guess all I can say is that’s the way of the road
I guess all I can say is that’s the way of the road

I heard from the devil I heard from the lord
I learned from ‘em both the rest I ignored
You can lose your soul to overload
I guess all I can say is that’s the way of the road

Girl can you tell me why I do what I do
No man in his right mind would ever leave you
And all the love you showed
I guess all I can say is that’s the way of the road
I guess all I can say is that’s the way of the road

From the album The Story Of It All, 2014

When All Else Fails

Turn to me when all else fails
I’m your train still in the station
Your ship before it sails
Turn to me when all else fails

Night will fall
It has no choice
There’s always pain
Inside the voice
That speaks to us of failure
Speaks to us of loss
Talking like a preacher
With his fingers crossed
Turn to me when all else fails
I’m your train still in the station
Your ship before it sails
Turn to me when all else fails

Kiss goodbye
To what you hold dear
It’s time to face
Your darkest fear
Recognize the question
In everything you hear
Recognize the distance
In what you thought was near
Turn to me when all else fails
I’m your train still in the station
Your ship before it sails
Turn to me when all else fails

I wear your heart
I bear your name
In time we saw
We’re just the same
God has never spoken
To you or me I know
And if he did well all he said
Was ‘time for you to go’
Turn to me when all else fails
I’m your train still in the station
Your ship before it sails
Turn to me when all else fails

From the album Raised In Vain, 2006

One Day At A Time

Ain’t looking forward – ain’t looking back
Don’t know who I am – I lost track
I got lost in the sea of souls
In this charade I played many roles

I know the sky ain’t falling
I know it’s not a crime
To live your life one day at a time

Ain’t asking questions – ain’t asking for
Your forgiveness on the killing floor
I trust my dreams to get me through
The days and nights of missing you

From London town to Tokyo
There I am wherever I go
People smiling – knives in backs
The future falling through the cracks

So call my name – I may turn around
Or just ignore that distant sound
In a world of pain there is no end
Last thing I need is another friend

From New Orleans to the Jersey Shore
Everybody asking – There must be more
More to life than what they see
They may be right but don’t ask me

So now it’s time to close the door
On all we said – and all we saw
It don’t matter what I do now
It’s all just pieces of a broken vow

From the album Arcana (The Lost Songs), 2017

God Ain’t Listening Any More

Listen to what those old fools say
in the name of god
People dying every day
in the name of god
But god he stopped listening
to his great mistake
Can’t do nothing any more
for god’s sake
God ain’t listening any more
God ain’t listening any more
God ain’t listening any more
God ain’t listening any more
Too much sorrow going round
in the name of god
There are fortunes to be found
in the name of god
God he stopped listening
to the evil done in his name
Said they can call me what they like
They’re all basically the same
God ain’t listening any more
God ain’t listening any more
God ain’t listening any more
God ain’t listening any more
He went off to start again
in the name of god
Said there’s no hope
for the likes of men
in the name of god
So god he started looking
for a planet far away
Where he could do things differently
Maybe get it right some day
God ain’t listening any more
God ain’t listening any more
God ain’t listening any more
(if he ever was)
God ain’t listening any more

From the album JanuaryRising, 2013

This Crazy World

The sun comes up
The sun goes down
Another day is burned
Our eyes open
Our eyes close
Another lesson learned…no
Nothing seems to change
We’re still the ones to blame
And this crazy world
Goes on just the same

A child is born
An old man dies
The circle goes around
A great oak falls
With no one there
So doesn’t make a sound
Nothing seems to change
In the endless cosmic game
And this crazy world
Goes on just the same

It’s a crazy world
It’s a crazy world

A wise man speaks
A fool speaks too
And promises are made
But which is which
And what is what
It’s all a sad parade
Nothing seems to change
They’re all pursuing fame
And this crazy world
Goes on just the same

If god were real
She’d surely speak
And send us all to hell
But we don’t need
A god to see
How far the apple fell
Nothing seems to change
It’s all a crying shame
And this crazy world
Goes on just the same

It’s a crazy world
It’s a crazy world
And this crazy world
Goes on just the same

From the album beneath a flagless moon, 2012

The Old Machine

You don’t need me to tell you
The eyes are growing dim
It’s time to meet your maker
If you still believe in him

They say do not go gentle
Refuse to hang your hat
But the best is all behind you
So what’s the point of that

Death is not the end
Some would have you think
But you’re not coming back here
So raise your glass and drink

Drink to the golden times
The not so good, the bad
Drink to all your enemies
And all the friends you had

Drink to all the lovers
Who shared their bodies well
The briefest taste of heaven in
Our daily stint in hell

You don’t need me to tell you
The lights are going out
No matter what you’ve heard it’s best
To go with a sigh not a shout

My friend I know you know
The end is close at hand
We always know it’s coming
But we never have it planned

The old machine is failing
It’s what it’s meant to do
But know through all eternity
No one but you was you

Recorded during the sessions for the album The Story Of It All, 2014 but left off the album. This is the first time this song has appeared on an album.

Arcana


Limited to 200 signed copies

Read the Story of Arcana

ACROSS THE LINE

I want to talk to her
But the years get in the way
If she could see through my eyes
I wonder what she’d say

The language that she speaks
Pours over me like wine
She’ll break nobody’s rules
As she steps across the line

She’ll break her share of hearts
She’s already broken mine
She did it without trying
With her face and walk so fine

Her body talks in riddles
Any man would want to solve
A pleasant way to waste your time
As night and day revolve

The language that she speaks
Pours over me like wine
She’ll break nobody’s rules
As she steps across the line

If she gave herself to me
The sky would surely fall
It’s best she doesn’t notice me
Doesn’t notice me at all

ALL THERE IS

Don’t look at me now
I ain’t the one
To tell you what you’re doing is right or wrong
Don’t look at me now
Don’t listen to what I say
I’m just trying to live through another day

I’m just trying
To betray you with a kiss
Asking myself is this all there is

Don’t look at me now
I’m moving on
Just passing through I will soon be gone
Don’t look at me now
I’m nothing but a ghost
I have no idea what you need the most

Don’t look at me now
I’m deaf and dumb
I can’t tell you what is to come
Don’t look at me now
In my ancient pose
I’m just a poor boy hiding in a rich man’s clothes

Don’t look at me now
Except to say
Our paths crossed in the briefest way
Don’t look at me now
For answers I don’t know
Just set me free let me go

BLUE HIGHWAYS

I came in from the East
From the belly of the beast
To this place where nothing matters
To this place where no one dreams
Where the future disappears in history’s screams

Everything was said in fun
No harm meant no damage done
But no one here was laughing
No one here saw the joke
You could tell what they were thinking but no one spoke

Used cars and damaged lives
(The harmonica plays)
Used cars and damaged lives
On these blue highways

You stand there face to face
But they’re staring into space
Through eyes their fathers gave them
And they’ll give to their sons
That way no one panics no one runs

Little to call theirs
And long-unanswered prayers
They have no one to blame
So they hate themselves instead
They blur the line between the living and the dead

REALITY WILL BREAK YOUR HEART

There’s not much I haven’t done
And even less I haven’t seen
I’ve been all those places
And the stages in between
But a mutual friend
Said keep myself apart
Dreams may not be real
But reality will break your heart

After you have changed the world
After you have said it all
It’s okay to stumble ’cause
You got no place to fall
But a mutual friend
Said keep the songs apart
The man is just the man
And reality will break your heart

The evening sky is still bright
Gently holding back the night
We see things in fading light
We never saw before

Oh so few women understand
Just what drives the hearts of men
These walls we build from things
We think we’ll never do again
But a mutual friend
Said keep the love apart
It will always comfort you
But reality will break your heart

MY FATHER’S SON

Taller than you by the age of twelve
Took me years to understand
It’s not in feet and inches
That you measure a man

All that I want said of me
When all is said and done
I was my father’s son
I was my father’s son

I couldn’t like the things you liked
No matter how I tried
Hope I kept it hidden
How that tore me up inside

We could have talked a little more
Not wasted so much time
You had your troubles this I know
And I had mine

My father’s son
My father’s son

The years they brought us closer
But they take with the other hand
Too soon the man and child
Are memory and man

THEIR WORLD NOW

We became invisible
Quite some time ago
But ah we once were men
Let the record show
We blazed our paths through time
Until time was done with us
Now our replacements ask
We go without a fuss

We look at the young girls
And our hearts must make a vow
To never say a word
‘cause it’s their world now

Once we were the heroes
Of the stories that we write
Reshaping everything
Changing day and night
No shortage of excuses
As we rocketed through years
We had many ways
To calm our fears

There is a certain calm
That only time can bring
We’d trade it in a heartbeat
For one final fling
One trip around the passions
Ah that we’d like to take
To feel the flames of new love
To feel the old heart break

THE 12TH BAR BLUES

I got the 12th bar blues
Ah they’re pounding in my head
I’m feeling like tomorrow I may wake up dead

Her name was Margarita
Hair as black as night
If she came to you no man alive would put up a fight

There’s a cowboy in the corner
Fast asleep beneath his hat
He may be a famous actor who found fame ain’t where it’s at

The jukebox looks quite ancient
But it’s singing it ain’t broke
Every title on it sounds like the punchline of a joke

There’s a couple at a table
She’s begging him to go
She has to get him out of here before he’s crippled down below

There’s a woman I remember
But I don’t recall where from
By the way she looks at me I guess I broke my rule of thumb

Now the ceiling’s changing places
Changing places with the floor
For the hundredth time tonight I say I ain’t doing this no more

These places have no mirrors
That’s so we can’t see the scars
We’re drowning in the gutter but we’re…we’re looking at the stars

NEVER MEANT TO KNOW

The lines in my face
Will lead you to my heart
If you really want to see what’s on show
They’ll tell you who I am
And why I don’t give a damn
And why right now I have to go
Before I tell you things you were never meant to know

The sound of my voice
Will lead you to my soul
A lonely place where everything moves so slow
You can say the fault is mine
That I failed to read the signs
On that corner all those years ago
When I told her things she was never meant to know

It was never meant to be like this
So close your eyes
Give me a kiss
Follow me down
It was never meant to be like this
So close your eyes
Give me a kiss
Follow me down to where tomorrow dies

The feel of my touch
Will lead you to yourself
To the river where all our feelings flow
You may see the way ahead
Where the living and the dead
Are just a tiny step from yes to no
And we learn things we were never meant to know

BY MORNING

I have seen the fire in the heavens
I have seen the stars that choose to fall
I’ll be there by morning
Or I won’t be there at all

Traveling the world as a stranger
Answering the lonely spirit’s call
I’ll be there by morning
Or I won’t be there at all

Days when the sky smiles upon you
Days when your back’s against the wall
I’ll be there by morning
Or I won’t be there at all

Time winds down like a clockwork toy
Everything bows down that once was tall
I’ll be there by morning
Or I won’t be there at all

Some men blaze a trail of golden ashes
Others are forever made to crawl
I’ll be there by morning
Or I won’t be there at all

It often seems that hatred wins the battles
But it’s never won a war as I recall
I’ll be there by morning
Or I won’t be there at all

I’ll be there by morning
Or I won’t be there at all

CRAWLING BLUES

I put my faith in Jesus
For a minute or two
I was told he walked on water but he never came through
So I put my faith in his father
And the stories of old
Then I saw his disciples chasing fame and gold

Ah we all get there
We all get there some day
But sometimes it feels like you’re crawling all the way

I put my faith in the devil
We met at the crossroads one night
But I couldn’t read his offer I needed a little more light
So I put my faith in a woman
My best wasn’t good enough
Seems she met the devil too and they fell in love

I put my faith in a bottle
Put my faith in alcohol
I remember I saw all the answers but I can’t recall
So I put my faith in the future
And the sound of distant drums
But I wasted all my time ‘cause tomorrow never comes

So I put my faith in nothing
Nothing left for me to do
But now I know for certain nothing is true

THE DREAMS OF MEN (ACOUSTIC VERSION)

Somewhere in the past there’s a reason
Somewhere a word we didn’t say
Somewhere the road not taken
Somewhere a price we didn’t pay

Somewhere a promise was broken
Somewhere a heart broke too
Somewhere a pain crossed over
From me to you

We can never know what happened
Ah we never will
We can never know what happened
On the far side of the hill

Somewhere the sun is going down
Somewhere it will rise again
Time just keeps on flying
Has no time for the dreams of men

We can never know what happened
Ah we never will
We can never know what happened
On the far side of the hill

Time just keeps on flying
Has no time for the dreams of men

SOMETHING YOU WANT

Time is a coward and just runs away
Says I’ll be seeing you some other day
There’s always a price to pay
For something you want

I’ve seen that look in your eyes
They take it on when you’re telling lies
Somewhere the real you cries
There’s something you want

Do I have something you need
A desire in your heart I can feed
But for starters are we agreed
There’s something you want

All the love that we once knew
Lies broken and bleeding on 8th Avenue
The only thing that is still true
There’s something you want

Your heart was always like this
Wanting your freedom but wanting a kiss
You don’t know what it is
This something you want

I’ve heard this talk before
Promises made with one hand on the door
The only thing that we know for sure
There’s something you want

 

THE END OF DAYS

Ugly people in pretty places
The pain of now on ancient faces
Everywhere the story’s the same
History dies façades remain

Is this the end of days
Am I awake or dreaming
Is this the way the world will end
Fast asleep but screaming

New Jersey hair and a Hollywood face
So-called style that has no place
In a world that thinks in a world that cares
We’re caught in the future’s Botox stares

Let me out please let me go
Where there’s more to see and know
Where truth and right are recognized
And thinking is not criticized

Take me back so far from here
When differences were loud and clear
When people knew who they were
Before mindlessness was de rigueur

Ugly people in pretty places
The pain of now on ancient faces
Everywhere the story’s the same
History dies façades remain

ONE DAY AT A TIME

Ain’t looking forward – ain’t looking back
Don’t know who I am – I lost track
I got lost in the sea of souls
In this charade I played many roles

I know the sky ain’t falling
I know it’s not a crime
To live your life one day at a time

Ain’t asking questions – ain’t asking for
Your forgiveness on the killing floor
I trust my dreams to get me through
The days and nights of missing you

From London town to Tokyo
There I am wherever I go
People smiling – knives in backs
The future falling through the cracks

So call my name – I may turn around
Or just ignore that distant sound
In a world of pain there is no end
Last thing I need is another friend

From New Orleans to the Jersey Shore
Everybody asking – There must be more
More to life than what they see
They may be right but don’t ask me

So now it’s time to close the door
On all we said – and all we saw
It don’t matter what I do now
It’s all just pieces of a broken vow

LIFE GOES ON

A new sunrise
Lovers say their goodbyes
The day begins
Only fools confess their sins
We all know something’s wrong but life goes on

We obey the law
Of what’s been done before
Avoiding the fire
Of unspoken desire
We all know something’s wrong but life goes on

We may know the sweet taste of success
Know what it’s like to fail
Either way life comes down to a half-price sale

We all pursue
What we think is true
Then we realize
It’s all made of lies
We all know something’s wrong but life goes on

I have seen the curse of a famous father
Make your road a steeper climb
By the time you’d found the word he’d already found the rhyme

We play the clown
With all our defenses down
We play the fool
The game becomes the rule
We all know something’s wrong but life goes on

LOVE AIN’T EASY

Blond hair on the white sheets she looked at him and said
Love ain’t easy
He said can I offer you something else instead
If love ain’t easy

What more can there be
(Her blue eyes turning red)
Love’s just you and me
Lost inside this bed
Love ain’t easy

She let him in her body but never in her heart
Love ain’t easy
But he was young and willing to simply play his part
‘Cause love ain’t easy

Fear kept her from feeling all there is to feel
Love ain’t easy
Her dream of love replacing the kind of love that’s real
Love ain’t easy

Blond hair on the white sheets she looked at him and said
Love ain’t easy
He said can I offer you something else instead
If love ain’t easy

THE LIKES OF YOU AND I

The way it was – the way it is
And the way it soon will be
Might as well be different worlds
For the likes of you and me
Some people stay in one place
It’s here they live and die
But life is not that simple
For the likes of you and I

There’s killing time and time to kill
And time to wait and see
Time is just a lame excuse
For the likes of you and me
We’ll never know the reason
Grown men bend and cry
There’s no light beyond the sunset
For the likes of you and I

It’s like it never happened
Except inside your head
For the likes of you and me babe
It’s all better left unsaid

Nothing changes – nothing stays unchanged
Or forever free
Everything is here and now
For the likes of you and me
People talk in riddles
Of how they’ve seen time fly
The time is always now
For the likes of you and I

AND SO THE HEART

Days of wide-eyed wonder
Nights of youthful lust
The highlights of the journey from dust to dust
Life once full of living
Death once held at bay
The two become much closer day by day

And so the heart confesses
That it never really knew
Exactly what it wanted
Or needed – it’s true
And so the heart remembers
Only what it chooses to
And so the heart remembers you

We spent our time forgetting
To remember all of it
Life was lived and burned bit by bit
So much feeling lost in
The fog of memory
We were making love not history

And so the heart confesses here to you
And so the heart undresses someone new

A thousand moments later
We realize it’s all gone
All of what was said and most of what was done
Days of wide-eyed wonder
Nights of youthful lust
The highlights of the journey from dust to dust

REMNANTS

Lying in the remnants of the night before
We have no idea
What we were hunting for
We don’t love each other
That much we agreed
Here in the remnants of the chemistry of need

Picking up the remnants of feelings torn apart
We blame the dark desires
We blame the foolish heart
Not many words escape us
Our thoughts are all restrained
Here in the remnants of the injuries sustained

Deciphering the remnants of lives we threw aside
To revel in the needs
For so long we denied
The sight of flesh on flesh
So hungry and so raw
Here in the remnants of the disregarded law

Discarding now the remnants of our hopeless little lives
Not ready for the boredom
Of husbands and their wives
We came for what we needed
We left with something less
Here in the remnants of a loss we can’t confess
Here in the remnants of a loss we can’t confess

WHERE MINE USED TO BE

I find myself in uncharted territory
What happens next we’ll just have to wait and see
I’m a stranger in a strange land
Gave it all up to be free
Give me your heart
And I’ll put it where mine used to be

Put your faith in this broken man you see
He has the strength to face the mystery
One last try is in his grasp
And your love is the key
Give me your heart
And I’ll put it where mine used to be

I woke up one morning
With a beauty in my bed
Could not understand
A single word she said
But the touch of her hands
Brought a man back from the dead
She gave me her heart
And I put it where mine used to be

Put your faith in this broken man you see
He has the strength to face the mystery
One last try is in his grasp
And your love is the key
Give me your heart
And I’ll put it where mine used to be

Give me your heart

NEXT TIME AROUND

Have you heard
What some folks say
We will be reborn
Part of me
Wants that chance
To heal what I have torn

I’d cross myself
(If I believed)
I’d swear on sacred ground
We’ll get it right – trust me baby
Next time around
We’ll get it right – trust me baby
Next time around

I lost your love
Way back when
I know that I was a fool
But we were young
And innocent
Breaking every rule

Next time around I’ll look for you
Any way I can
Next time around I will be
A better man

Do your arms
Remember me
Do they reach for me still
Do you recall
Our crazy love
Or those our love would kill

The Story Of It All


If The Blues Ever Ends

Go on without me I’m staying here
Where the skies are still blue and the waters run clear
I’ve been dreaming of this thirty years or more
With a pain in my heart that I bought one time in a record store

Didn’t see it coming just music I thought
But the blues took my soul and I spent my life caught
I’ve still got the blues but they’re worth nothing more
Than this pain in my heart that I bought one time in a record store

Mississippi John Hurt – Big Joe Williams and friends
Can you come back and tell me if the blues ever ends

Small town kid nowhere to run
Found a home in these voices baked in the sun
Voices soaked in the dreams of the poor
Made this pain in my heart that I bought one time in a record store

Mississippi John Hurt – Robert Johnson and friends
Can you come back and tell me if the blues ever ends

They sang about a different life
Where the master was god and could borrow your wife
I can’t claim I was ever whipped raw
Just got this pain in my heart that I bought one time in a record store

Go on without me I’m staying here
Where the skies are still blue and the waters run clear
I’ve been dreaming of this thirty years or more
With a pain in my heart that I bought one time in a record store

Mississippi John Hurt – John Lee Hooker and friends
Can you come back and tell me if the blues ever ends
Can you come back and tell me if the blues ever ends

The Story Of It All

Here we are again my friend still alone together
So many memories of fine and stormy weather
You the child who would not die – me the ancient soul
Together in this heart – growing old

We argue and we fight and lie but it never shows
We’re bruised and we’re beaten but no one ever knows
Every word’s a compromise – every smile a fake
We agree to disagree for each other’s sake

Are there voices in your head just like there are in mine
Do they tell you lies like everything will work out fine

I look in the mirror who do I see
This stranger in the dark is it you or me
Doesn’t really matter now – I don’t need to know
Here we are again my friend – where you go I go

One thing that’s for sure there is no curtain call
Like it or not this is the story of it all

One thing for sure there is no curtain call
This is the story of it all

One thing for sure there is no curtain call
This is the story of it all

Are there voices in your head just like there are in mine
Do they tell you lies like everything will work out fine

Drowning In The Silence

A lucky man he made it home after the war
Turned his collar to the wind said it’s now or not at all
It’s now or not at all
He’d known the girl for a little while before he went away
But war taught him that life could not wait another day
Couldn’t wait another day
When you’re drowning in the silence – drowning in the silence
Drowning in the silence of love

Wedding bells would make it right or so they thought
But they were just another kind of victim of the war that they just fought
Yeah the war that they just fought
They fooled themselves for a little while – fooled the others too
Can hide a lot behind a smile even dreams that don’t come true
Even dreams that don’t come true
When you’re drowning in the silence – drowning in the silence
Drowning in the silence of love

They had a child in ’52 that was all there’d be
Maybe they should’ve called it quits but they stayed because of me
Ah they stayed because of me
I saw them drowning in the silence – drowning in the silence
Drowning in the silence of their love

I’d lie awake and listen to the anger fill the air
But next morning all was fine I was not supposed to care
I was not supposed to care
That we were drowning in the silence – drowning in the silence
Drowning in the silence of their love

Not everyone can find true love – oh I wish they could
It’s too easy in this life to do harm by doing good…

Night Circus (You’re Not Here)

I feel the wind
I feel it blowing
But where it goes is never really clear
I let it take me
Without knowing
‘cause you’re not here

Life holds a card
And it must deal it
I hold my breath and taste the edge of fear
The rain pours down
But I don’t feel it
‘cause you’re not here
You’re not here

The night is long
But has no reason
The redhead asks do I want another beer
My darker side
Is talking treason
‘cause you’re not here
You’re not here

(Spoken)

The lights of Tokyo
burn like acid in the back of your eyes
and you realize
this is home for the homeless
and for a short while…you are one of them

Flying Time

White jet trails carving up the sky – just some strangers passing by
I don’t want to be lonely any more
Soon they’ll be gone without a sound
Glad I got my feet on the ground
I don’t want to be lonely any more
Don’t want to be lonely like a lost soul in the night
Don’t want to be lonely always in flight
I used to be way up there too – a first class fool looking down on you
I don’t want to be lonely any more

I used to sit and watch life go by through a tiny window up in the sky
I don’t want to be lonely any more
I knew the flying time from here to there
But where I landed well I didn’t care
I don’t want to be lonely any more
I don’t want to be lonely like a rich man with no soul
Don’t want to be lonely growing old
Used to sell everything it’s true for those who believe in the heart tattoo
I don’t want to be lonely any more

Now I watch the sunset every day – I watch the way the colors play
I don’t want to be lonely any more
Time slows down when you’re feeling good
When you let the calm into your blood
I don’t want to be lonely any more
I don’t want to be lonely in the middle of a crowd
Don’t want to be lonely so I say out loud
I never did like the man I used to be – I let him go so willingly
I don’t want to be lonely any more
I never did like the man I used to be – I let him go so easily
I don’t want to be lonely any more

The Way Of The Road (For Bob Dylan)

I’m sitting in this diner with thoughts of what was
I’m thinking of leaving but I don’t because
I hear the jukebox reload
I guess all I can say is that’s the way of the road

Don’t know where I’m going don’t know where I’ve been
I’m out here waiting for my life to begin
Free from this heavy load
I guess all I can say is that’s the way of the road
I guess all I can say is that’s the way of the road

This broken old voice and the words it sings
These tired fingers on silver strings
Every song a seed we sowed
I guess all I can say is that’s the way of the road

They say that we’re dying and it’s probably true
It’s all that you’ve known what else can you do
You lived your whole life by the code
I guess all I can say is that’s the way of the road
I guess all I can say is that’s the way of the road

I heard from the devil I heard from the lord
I learned from ‘em both the rest I ignored
You can lose your soul to overload
I guess all I can say is that’s the way of the road

Girl can you tell me why I do what I do
No man in his right mind would ever leave you
And all the love you showed
I guess all I can say is that’s the way of the road
I guess all I can say is that’s the way of the road

Don’t Give a Damn #2

So many names for the things I do
And so many more for what I am
But it never got through to you
I don’t give a damn

You know I saw the plans you had for me
I saw the tattered blueprints on your wall
I could never get you to see
I didn’t care at all

It don’t matter anymore to me
What you are or who you want to be
I’ve had enough of your talk
And your misplaced honesty
To last a lifetime
Okay it’s your way but it’s just not mine

So many games you loved to play
And so many lies you told to me
Now at long last I look back and say
It’s all history

It don’t matter anymore to me
What you are or who you want to be
I’ve had enough of your talk
And your misplaced honesty
To last a lifetime
Okay it’s your way but it’s just not mine

The Thunderbird Motel

This life has happy endings – not as many as we’d wish
We all end up somewhere – we can’t predict the finish
You may find yourself in heaven
You may find yourself in hell
Or in a lonely room at The Thunderbird Motel

Love is what we chase for the whole time that we’re here
But how it really works is never quite made clear
You may find yourself in heaven
You may find yourself in hell
Or in a lonely room at The Thunderbird Motel

Tell me your room number – I’ll tell you mine
Just bring your willing body – I will bring the wine

Every road we take is paved with good intentions
But demons walk these same streets no teacher ever mentions
You may find yourself in heaven
You may find yourself in hell
Or in a lonely room at The Thunderbird Motel

Tell me your room number – I’ll tell you mine
Just bring your willing body – I will bring the wine

Every night we live in dreams of how different things could be
If every choice we ever made we decided differently
You may find yourself in heaven
You may find yourself in hell
Or in a lonely room at The Thunderbird Motel

No More Secrets

These tears are new and they burn like hell
Each one a secret I could never tell
Each one a photograph I could never show
It’s taken all these years but now you know
No more secrets
No more lies
No more excuses no more childish alibis
No more secrets

Forgive the past – forgive what was
It’s hard to do but we must because
A little bit of love dies with every untrue word
And when you think about it that’s a little absurd
No more secrets
No more lies
No more excuses no more childish alibis
No more secrets

You look into my past and forgive everything you see
Long may it be this way…long may it be…long may it be

I am me and you are you
Guilty of all we say and do
Past is past and gone is gone
Forgiveness lets our love go on
No more secrets
No more lies
No more excuses no more childish alibis
No more secrets

Another You Another Me

You and I will meet on a random street
Thirty years from now
You’ll be married – tired and harried
Fresh from your latest row
We’ll wish that we were both still free
We’ll talk of vanished years
I’ll talk of lies and watch your eyes
Fill with ancient tears
The future’s waiting but you won’t like what you see
Another you – another me

I’ll look at you and see right through
The winter coat you wear
To the body I knew when we were 22
Naked without a care
The future’s waiting but you won’t like what you see
Another you – another me

You’ll say it’s strange – I don’t seem to change
I’ll say the same about you
You’ll tell me I still know how to lie
I’ll say it’s just not true
The future’s waiting but you won’t like what you see
Another you – another me

Remember this there’ll be a kiss
Truth revealed in a touch
We’ll walk away for ever that day
More would only hurt too much
The future’s waiting but you won’t like what you see
Another you – another me

If Seeing Is Believing

The Mona Lisa’s naked – the world has gone to hell
It seems quite at home there as far as I can tell
Oh I wandered to the edge and I gazed out at the view
If seeing is believing
Not much of it is true…not much of it is true

I want to sleep tonight and dream of being free
A different tomorrow lived by a different me
Oh I wandered to the edge and I gazed out at the view
If seeing is believing
Not much of it is true…not much of it is true

I’m dismantling the memories I don’t want to keep
The ones that haunt me still awake or in my sleep
I’m throwing out the questions that there are no answers for
‘cause in my heart I know – in my heart I know
In my heart I know nothing is for sure

My voice is crying out for some kind of friend
I’ve hurt too many people for one heart to mend
Oh I wandered to the edge and I gazed out at the view
If seeing is believing
Not much of it is true…not much of it is true

I’m trying to make a man – a man that you might love
I’m drawing a new line for me to rise above
Oh I wandered to the edge and I gazed out at the view
If seeing is believing
Not much of it is true…not much of it is true

Twilight Of Reason

(For my mother Grace: 1927-2010)Here in the twilight of reason
Here in this strange new land
Ah won’t someone take my handI used to be a young girl
Oh I had my days
Now it’s just my mind that straysI used to have a husband
I still see his face
But the years since he left are an empty spaceI used to sing and dance
Have fun like people do
I forget how this darkness grewPhotographs they tell me
All I’ve done and seen
But memories are few and far between

Here in the twilight of reason
Here in this strange new land
Ah won’t someone take my hand

You can come on the wings of fire
You can climb down from your cross
Just give me back what I have lost
Just give me back what I have lost

JanuaryRising


God Ain’t Listening Anymore

Listen to what those old fools say
in the name of god
People dying every day
in the name of god
But god he stopped listening
to his great mistake
Can’t do nothing any more
for god’s sake
God ain’t listening any more
God ain’t listening any more
God ain’t listening any more
God ain’t listening any more
Too much sorrow going round
in the name of god
There are fortunes to be found
in the name of god
God he stopped listening
to the evil done in his name
Said they can call me what they like
They’re all basically the same
God ain’t listening any more
God ain’t listening any more
God ain’t listening any more
God ain’t listening any more
He went off to start again
in the name of god
Said there’s no hope
for the likes of men
in the name of god
So god he started looking
for a planet far away
Where he could do things differently
Maybe get it right some day
God ain’t listening any more
God ain’t listening any more
God ain’t listening any more
(if he ever was)
God ain’t listening any more

In Broken Sleep

In broken sleep we love again
like the present is the past
Our bodies and our hearts now know
the fire that cannot last
Love and time are enemies
and both are on the loose
The only thing worth fighting for
is the momentary truce
The momentary truce babe
The momentary truce
In broken sleep we see ourselves
and watch through different eyes
As strangers who we barely know
begin to materialize
Soft hellos are spoken
The pleasantries are said
I haven’t seen you for so long
I thought that you were dead
I thought that you were dead babe
I thought that you were dead
In broken sleep we wonder what
it’s like to never wake
But soon enough we see the road
that we all someday take
The darkness fills our minds with things
we should not contemplate
We have no way of knowing
if it’s early or it’s late
it’s early or it’s late babe
Early or it’s late
So in broken sleep we love again
like the present is the past
Our bodies and our hearts now know
the fire that cannot last
Love and time are enemies
and both are on the loose
The only thing worth fighting for
is the momentary truce
The momentary truce babe
The momentary truce

Santiago Rain

How can we be here this morning
You so young and me so old
Waking in your arms believing
my last story’s told
Who am I to doubt your reason
Who am I to walk away
From a heart out of season
that chose my heart today
All I see now is your beauty
A beauty close to pain
That washes over me now
like the Santiago rain
like the Santiago rain
Now you stand by the window
I am jealous of the light
touching you in a new way
undiscovered by the night
All I see now is your beauty
A beauty close to pain
That washes over me now
like the Santiago rain
like the Santiago rain
How can we be here this morning
You so young and me so old
Waking in your arms believing
my last story’s told
All I see now is your beauty
A beauty close to pain
That washes over me now
like the Santiago rain
like the Santiago rain

(Love Is) The Only Surprise

Dreams they die in the blink of an eye
These things we do just to get by
I can’t believe what I see with my own eyes
Love is the only surprise
I never will learn to kill
this pain inside though I’ve had my fill
I think the world is made up of treachery and lies
Love is the only surprise
If I could I’d take you
to a place you’ve never been
Somewhere between a marriage
and the seventh deadly sin
I would keep you company
you’d never feel alone
As we broke every law
that was ever carved in stone
It’s come to this one last kiss
I can’t believe that’s all there is
But every time I see you something in me dies
Love is the only surprise
I’m not taking bets on how good it gets
I’ve known love with no regrets
When I get to thinking that I gave away the prize
Love is the only surprise
In the end we never mend
A lover can’t become a friend
Even though they tell you that it never dies
Love is the only surprise

Middle Ground

It’s where we used to stand
It’s where we used to meet
It shaped the conversation
on every corner of every street
It’s where the low were lifted
The mighty were brought down
It said we’re all the same
In rags or evening gown
Look in the darkest shadows
Search the world around
You’ll find that it’s not hiding
It’s gone and can’t be found
Thanks to all our foolishness
there is no middle ground
It’s where the heart found comfort
It’s where the fears were calmed
Where traitors were exposed
And lunatics disarmed
It’s where the proud were doubted
Where the humble got to speak
It’s where the strong were challenged
to give strength to the weak
It’s where your brother rested
It’s where your sister rose
Where no upper hand was lifted
in a dominating pose
It’s where heaven listened
to the needs of men
Where god had many names
and the sword bowed to the pen
It’s where the lonely found
what they were looking for
It’s where a gentle push
opened any door
It’s where anger was defeated
Where compassion took its place
Where no one was judged
by their age or sex or race
It’s where the old revealed
all that they had learned
No knowledge was abandoned
No book was ever burned
It’s where the past and future
came to an accord
It’s where no man was servant
It’s where no man was Lord
It’s where no man was servant
It’s where no man was Lord

Broken Cup

I can’t say I ever loved you more
I can’t say I ever loved you less
Sometimes all we can do is do our best
There’s a dark cloud
building in the distance
Could be my past catching up
Sometimes we drink from crystal
Sometimes a broken cup
Never had a plan of what might happen
Never was a close friend of regret
My life was never ruled by what hadn’t happened yet
I fought my little wars the best I could
I suffered a broken heart and broken dreams
Then a new day would arrive on sunlight’s beams
There’s a dark cloud
building in the distance
Could be my past catching up
Sometimes we drink from crystal
Sometimes a broken cup
The highest high you never see it coming
The best in life takes you by surprise
The finest things of all never advertise
I can’t say I don’t wish for changes
I wish I could throw time in reverse
But getting your wish often makes things worse
There’s a dark cloud
building in the distance
Could be my past catching up
Sometimes we drink from crystal
Sometimes a broken cup

Diamonds In The Dirt (For Leonard Cohen)

The man can’t sleep so he walks the night
with visions in his head
He’s tasted all the life there is
Had angels in his bed
It doesn’t matter what he did
All that he achieved
His burden will be lifted soon
And he will be relieved
You can’t escape the spiral down
You can’t explain the hurt
No matter what we say or do
we’re diamonds in the dirt
The man of words his soul on fire
had just one road to take
Pushed himself to think much higher
knowing how much was at stake
Now he walks a true straight line
No fork in his path
He trades the road less traveled
for life’s ironic laugh
He will be remembered well
His name will be enshrined
On one too many monuments
Built by those inclined
to think he had the answers
when questions were his trade
To think he had a purpose
for every move he made
The man proclaims he always knew
the ocean was his sister
Once he climbed a mountain
but discovered that he missed her
Their story has come down through time
with many ancient names
He knew one day his Viking heart
would sail away in flames

The Journey

There’s no way I can tell you all I know
You would not believe a word I say
There’s no way that I can ever show
my feelings without pushing you away
It’s just the nature of this thing that we’ve begun
This journey of a father and a son
There’s no way I can tell you all I’ve done
You would not believe that it’s all true
How they filled me with fear – gave me a gun
Told me I was fighting for the unborn you
It’s just the nature of
this thing that we’ve begun
This journey of a father and a son
There’s no way I can tell you how it felt
Back home in that New Mexican motel
In your mother’s arms my fears would melt
My body home my mind still in hell
Now you talk of war and destiny
And I feel the blood run cold in my veins
I know in my heart what must be
I gave you life now you’re asking for the reins
It’s just the nature of
this thing that we’ve begun
This journey of a father and a son
You will leave to fight your battles this I know
And I will long for your safe return
There’s no way I can tell you before you go
This is not the way I wanted you to learn
It’s just the nature of
this thing that we’ve begun
This journey of a father and a son

Until Time Is Gone

I believe
Oh I believe
you and I were meant to be
The other hearts
Those other hearts
We finally chose
to set them free
And meet here between the devil
and the deep blue sea
Talk to me
Talk to me
Tell me what you know I need
Tell the truth
Tell the truth
Please don’t let
these old wounds bleed
and I will do the same for you
until our hearts are freed
Beneath the endless circle
of the sun and the moon
even love is temporary
We leave too soon
Walk with me
Walk with me
Take me where I need to go
Show to me
Show to me
all the things I need to know
And I’ll admit the feelings
I could never show
Call my name
Call my name
Tell me life still goes on
Hold me now
Hold me now
Tell me I am still the one
and I will spend my time with you
until time is gone
and I will spend my time with you
until time is gone

Save Me A Place (For Craig Rodgers)

Save me a place ‘cos I’ll be there soon
And we’ll sit together and howl at the moon
We’ll talk of what was
and what might have been
Who’s out there sailing
And whose ship has come in
Save me a place ‘cos I’ll be there soon
And we’ll sit together and howl at the moon
We’ll remember old friends
The valuable few
All the dreams that failed
And the ones that came true
Save me a place ‘cos I’ll be there soon
And we’ll sit together and howl at the moon
We’ll talk of the ones
our hearts won and lost
Of the winters of warmth
and the summers of frost
Save me a place ‘cos I’ll be there soon
And we’ll sit together and howl at the moon
We’ll say what we never
had the courage to say
Then we’ll be so quiet
at the end of the day
Save me a place ’cos I’ll be there soon
And we’ll sit together and howl at the moon

Marking Time (For Richard Tutin)

There’s something in my heart that shouldn’t be there
Something in my soul I can’t explain
A feeling like it isn’t really me there
But a fragment of someone else’s pain
It’s been there since I was born
A coat that I have worn
down through my winters of decline
There’s something in my heart
that shouldn’t be there…marking time
All the souls I was have come to listen
They’ve all come to see how far we came
They are gathered here to testify
we share so much more than just a name
They’ve been there since I was born
A coat that I have worn
down through my winters of decline
There’s something in my heart
that shouldn’t be there…marking time
There’s something in my heart
that shouldn’t be there…marking time
Marking time till I was ready
to face them openly at last
Marking time till I was ready
to know the past ain’t really past
It’s been there
since I was born
A coat that I have worn
down through my winters of decline
There’s something in my heart
that shouldn’t be there…marking time

Paid In Full

I needed a porter to carry my bags
I thought the train was set to leave
I had too much weighing me down
No sign of a reprieve
So I left it all in the left luggage room
forgot all the deals that were made
My debts are paid
My debts are paid
My debts are paid in full
The memory of you is as fresh as can be
despite the years gone by
The others who wandered into our game
of hello and goodbye
Oh I should let you all sleep peaceful tonight
safe in the lives that you made
My debts are paid
My debts are paid
My debts are paid in full
I owe nothing to nobody
no…no more
I got nothing at all to apologize for
I’m done
with the push and the pull
My debts are paid
My debts are paid
My debts are paid in full
I gave all I could to the Avenue
It bled me dry of ideas
We danced on command like monkeys on strings
Sex and money the only souvenirs
So I walked away
and I never looked back
No more for them to degrade
My debts are paid
My debts are paid
My debts are paid in full

That’s Life

I’ve been the king and I’ve played the clown
That’s life
I’ve been the verb and I’ve been the noun
That’s life
When you’re on the top you don’t know it
When you’re at the bottom well you just don’t show it
I’ve been right side up and upside down
That’s life
I’ve been loved and I’ve been thrown out
That’s life
I’ve known hope and I’ve known doubt
That’s life
I’ve seen beauty and I’ve seen hate
I’ve been early and I’ve been too late
I learned more from a whisper than a shout
That’s life
I’ve been the winner and I lost it all
That’s life
I seen men rise and I seen ‘em crawl
That’s life
I’ve seen the mighty fall down hard
Seen a loser play a winning card
I learned to stand and I learned to fall
That’s life
I’ve been a puppet and a puppeteer
That’s life
I’ve been convicted and I got off clear
That’s life
Seen the rich who have no taste
I’ve seen the best just go to waste
I’ve known peace and I’ve known fear
That’s life
I’ve been a lover and I’ve been loved too
That’s life
I’ve longed for the old and embraced the new
That’s life
Made mistakes and I got it right
I’ve slept all day and blazed all night
I’ve heard the lies seen ‘em all come true
That’s life

Beneath A Flagless Moon


City of Ghosts

Love and youth are sisters
And both were ending soon
As we held on to each other
Beneath a flagless moon
Our hearts were making promises
We knew we could not keep
Memories don’t die
They just fall asleep

One more glass of wine
In the city of ghosts
One more glass of wine
In the city of ghosts
I’m trying to forget
Who I remember the most
One more glass of wine
In the city of ghosts

Somewhere in my mind
I’m still going through
Those long hot summer nights
On 8th Avenue
Second childhood fires
Burning in our veins
But after any fire
Nothing much remains

On the west side of Manhattan
Looking at New Jersey lights
Somewhere between the future
And those distant fights
Somewhere between my true love
And those dark erotic nights
On the west side of Manhattan
Looking at New Jersey lights

Give me a break of day
Give me a shot of gin
Rewind all of this
To where I came in
Can you do that for me honey
Can your love do that
Or am I like everybody
Stuck exactly where I’m at

Merciful Release

Want to see the blue sky
Where no buildings block the sun
Don’t care how many years I’ve had
I want to feel like I’ve just begun

I want to make it
Out of the city
I want to make it
In one piece
I’ve been dreaming for so long
Of this merciful release

I want to tell my father
Wherever he may be
Your son made it out alive
Your son is finally free

I don’t understand the music
Of the city no more
Every day’s a fight
What are we fighting for

I want to see the desert
To the mountains slowly climb
To the rocks that change so slowly
That they seem unchanged
In one lifetime

Santa Fe

Is this the road
I was born to take
How many times
Can one heart break
All the love
The pain and fear
Were they designed
To lead me here
Were they designed
To lead me here

Is this the place
That called to me
Back in time
When I could not see
I could not see
The price I’d pay
To see the stars
Over Santa Fe
To see the stars
Over Santa Fe

Great men talk
Of destiny
I never knew
What I would be
My heart dictated
Every turn
The things I’d lose
The things I’d learn
The things I’d lose
The things I’d learn

Is this the road
I was born to take
How many times
Can one heart break
All the love
The pain and fear
Were they designed
To lead me here
Were they designed
To lead me here

See What Time Has Done

We are the ones
Who fought against the past
We are the ones
Who believed the dream could last

Now we’re on the run
Now we’re on the run
See what time has done

We are the ones
Who marched to a different drum
We are the ones
Blew the old to kingdom come

See what time has done
To the visions of our youth
We never meant to lie
We just never faced the truth
We never meant to lie
We just never faced the truth

We are the ones
Who rewrote all the rules
We are the ones
Who now sometimes look like fools

This Crazy World

The sun comes up
The sun goes down
Another day is burned
Our eyes open
Our eyes close
Another lesson learned…no
Nothing seems to change
We’re still the ones to blame
And this crazy world
Goes on just the same

A child is born
An old man dies
The circle goes around
A great oak falls
With no one there
So doesn’t make a sound
Nothing seems to change
In the endless cosmic game
And this crazy world
Goes on just the same

It’s a crazy world
It’s a crazy world

A wise man speaks
A fool speaks too
And promises are made
But which is which
And what is what
It’s all a sad parade
Nothing seems to change
They’re all pursuing fame
And this crazy world
Goes on just the same

If god were real
She’d surely speak
And send us all to hell
But we don’t need
A god to see
How far the apple fell
Nothing seems to change
It’s all a crying shame
And this crazy world
Goes on just the same

It’s a crazy world
It’s a crazy world
And this crazy world
Goes on just the same

Every Word You Write (For J.J.Cale)

Every word you write
Is the right one
Nothing too obscure
Every note you play
Has meaning
Tells us of how we were

Hey JJ
Play your song for me
Hey JJ
Play your song for me
Built of understanding
Wrapped in simplicity
Hey JJ
Play your song for me

You say what you know
Needs saying
Nothing ever sounds too proud
The love the hurt
Yeah even the anger
Have no need to shout out loud

You leave out
What don’t need saying
There’s space between the notes
Words are not
Like nails
Meaning it drifts and floats

Going Home

I’m going home now darling
I’m going home at last
Gonna see the ones I left crying
Crying in the past

I did not mean to hurt ‘em
Or make love a kind of crime
It’s just that I seemed to get it wrong
Almost all the time

I wonder if I’m forgiven
If they remember me at all
Or was I just some distraction
Between the spring and fall

Well my love was real as rainbows
I was not playing games
I remember them all quite clearly
But I was never good with names

I’ll Be There For You

Call me when your dreams
Are beyond repair
Girl you know
That I’ll be there
Oh on a wing
And a prayer
I’ll be there for you
I’ll be there for you

Call me when your hopes
Are in retreat
Girl you know
That we can meet
In that little place
Down on Prince Street
I’ll be there for you
I’ll be there for you

There in your night
When there are fears to fight
I’ll be there for you

Call me when the emptiness
Fills your heart
I’ll show that
It’s nothing apart
From a pause before
Something new can start
I’ll be there for you
I’ll be there for you

Call me when tomorrow
Seems too far
For you to get to
From where you are
I’ll drive you there
In my hired car
I’ll be there for you
I’ll be there for you

There when you call
Just before you fall
I’ll be there for you

On Brighton Beach

Staring at the bottom
Of your empty china cup
What do you say
When the words are all used up
Where do you go
When the road comes to an end
Can scars that can’t be seen ever mend

A father with his talk
Of kings and queens
Sense of service frozen
In sepia scenes
How do you grab the world
He don’t understand
You make a start down in the pebbles and the sand

On Brighton Beach
Beneath the pier
Anywhere
That isn’t here
Anywhere
Beyond their reach
Beneath the pier
On Brighton Beach

A mother with no love
Just a military wife
A victim of the vanished
British Empire life
Where do you go to find out
Who you are
You tell yourself again it’s not too far

Fade To Black

I used to think
I would never die
Oh how the world has changed
Sitting here
Watching time go by
Oh how the world has changed
There’s no time
To make amends
Oh how the world has changed
We can’t be lovers
But can we be friends
Oh how the world has changed

It changed
When we weren’t watching
And it’s not changing back
There are no colors
Washed by the rain
That don’t one day fade to black

We dealt our share
Of jacks and queens
Oh how the world has changed
We made it through
All of those scenes
Oh how the world has changed
We bear the scars
Of what we rise above
Oh how the world has changed
We learned the meaning
Of true love
Oh how the world has changed

We fought for all
That we believed
Oh how the world has changed
We weren’t wrong
We were just deceived
Oh how the world has changed
Sitting here
On a summer lawn
Oh how the world has changed
Pretending not to miss
Those who are gone
Oh how the world has changed

More Than Enough

Didn’t think I’d make it
Quite this far
I wear my life
Like an old scar

But I got you
And I got your love
And that’s more than enough

Some hearts got broken
Along the way
I know we’re sorry
But it’s too late to say

Didn’t always stay
True to myself
I learned the hard way
That’s bad for your health

I got more than enough
And baby I know it
When you got more than enough
It’s best to not show it

I hurt some people
I got hurt too
It’s just the price
You pay getting through

No mother no father
I’d be all alone
If you didn’t give me
This foundation of stone

I got more than enough
And baby I know it
When you got more than enough
It’s best to not show it

At the end of the day
The sun goes down
We die so far
From our home town

Sometimes

Sometimes
I can’t forget
I was once in love with you
Sometimes
I have no regret
I was once in love with you
Then there are the nights
Of dreaming
Of your body under mine
Sometimes
I can’t forget
This love so deep and fine

Sometimes
I wonder why
I did not stay with you
Sometimes
I even lie
Tell myself what isn’t true
Then there are the nights
Of wishing
I could touch you next to me
Sometimes
I wonder why
We could never just let it be

Love is a true description
Of what happened
To you and I
But quite unplanned
We decided
To stand and watch love die

Sometimes
I can’t forget
I was once in love with you
Sometimes
I have no regret
I was once in love with you
Then there are the nights
Of dreaming
Of your body under mine
Sometimes
I can’t forget
And I feel my heart resign

Any Minute Now

It’s raining in the mountains
I can see it from here
Any minute now
The sun is going down
But when we wake
The sky will be clear
And we can take
A ride into town

I live my father’s anger
He passed it down to me
Any minute now
My eyes will cloud
The blood comes rising up
For everyone to see
The words become
Pointed and loud

I want to get the time back
I squandered in the past
Any minute now
Time will just run out
It goes without me saying
Time has always run too fast
We’re gone before
We know what it’s about

I dream I’m in a room
And the room is full of women
Any minute now
The real fun will start
All the ones I loved
From here to the beginning
It’s no wonder that
I wear a damaged heart

It’s raining in the mountains
I can see it from here
Any minute now
The sun is going down
But when we wake
The sky will be clear
And we can take
A ride into town

Harvesting Light

Darkness all around
And it’s not even night
Oh harvesting light
It’s so hard to see
So hard to pick the fight
Oh harvesting light
Looking for the moments
When the light
Comes breaking through
Sometimes it’s from
Another heart
Sometimes it’s from you
So you keep it in a safe place
That’s all you can do
Oh harvesting light

So much love and comfort
Hiding in plain sight
Oh harvesting light
I hear voices calling
For permission to be right
Oh harvesting light
Looking for the moments
When the eyes are open wide
And even in the darkness
Gather all we need inside
The tiny spark of living
Learned from those who died
Harvesting light

Living without distance
No width or depth or height
Oh harvesting light
Illumination rises
Beyond just black and white
Oh harvesting light
Looking for the moments
When the darkness briefly clears
Washed away like used up days
By salty diamond tears
When the light of reason
Briefly shines
Upon our humdrum fears
Oh harvesting light

We think we see an answer
But it isn’t quite
Oh harvesting light
Still we hold it closely
Still we hold it tight
Oh harvesting light
Looking for the moments
When it makes a kind of sense
When the fog of history’s traded
For the simple present tense
When the holy and the godless
Give up all pretense
Oh harvesting light

Waiting For My Heart

An angel wrapped me
In her wings
She taught me
All kinds of things
Freed the puppet
From his strings
When an angel wrapped me
In her wings
Now I’m waiting cold as stone
Waiting for my heart to come home

A beauty took me
By surprise
I fell into
Her clichéd eyes
I briefly saw
That distant prize
When a beauty took me
By surprise
Now I’m waiting cold as stone
Waiting for my heart to come home

Loneliness
Played its games
Love and friendship
Changing names
Till it all went down in flames

A quiet child
Crept up on me
With a kind of love
You seldom see
Careless caring
Tight but free
When a quiet child
Crept up on me
Now I’m waiting cold as stone
Waiting for my heart to come home

Loneliness
Played its games
Love and friendship
Changing names
Till it all went down in flames
Now I’m waiting cold as stone
Waiting for my heart to come home

Undeserving

There’s a cold wind blowing
Out of the past
To right here where I stand
It’s taken everything
We thought would last
Everything that we had planned

There’s no way of knowing
If words might heal
Too late to hear them said
Too late to stop
Too late to feel
Time just runs ahead

I know that I am undeserving
I know what I’m undeserving of
I know that I am undeserving
Of your time and your love

There’s a cold wind blowing
You feel it too
You feel it on your skin
It’s everything
We thought was true
All we wanted to begin

The Road To Never Mind

No one here is listening
To a single word you say
You know yourself so well
You’re gonna say it any way
That’s how it all gets easier
How anger is confined
On the road to never mind

Now all the things you value
Don’t have value any more
They seem to take for granted
All the things that you fought for
But they’re just moving forward
Leaving you behind
On the road to never mind

You have no say you’re left here
By a woman passing through
Your father gives you your last name
And the rest is up to you
Then one day you see that they
Were simply flying blind
On the road to never mind

An afternoon in Paris
And the color of her hair
It all travels with you
Even things from way back there
Like a winter’s night in England
When a flagless moon was kind
On the road to never mind

I let the anger wash away
In the distant Asian rain
Now all the guessing’s over
Just the questions still remain
But there are dusty names
For all that is enshrined
On the road to never mind

I know I say too many times a day
That I love you
I’m afraid if it’s not said
It ceases to be true
I’ve seen the silence grow
Seen the closest hearts unwind
On the road to never mind

I don’t believe in god
And I never learned to pray
I don’t believe I’ll see the light
Or face a judgment day
There’s no place where faith
Can be safely redefined
On the road to never mind

The past just keeps repeating
With the names and faces changed
They say to protect the innocent
But that’s always sounded strange
May tomorrow look with kindness
On all that we declined
On the road to never mind
On the road to never mind
Never mind…

Raised In Vain & Afterthought


13 Down

Tokyo nights
LA days
Sunset on the seven seas
European ways
Asian eyes
Woken by a tropical breeze
Grand Central Station
The lost and found
Looking for the answer to 13 down

New York games
London rain
The colors of New England fall
Brazilian smiles
African skies
The dusty winds of Senegal
A tiny island
A brand new town

Looking for the answer to 13 down

The clues are tricks played by the mind
The blues are never far behind

Parisian dreams
Chinese fire
A girl named Boy in a Bangkok bar
Italian streets
Desert sands
The gentle kiss of the northern star
A drifting boat
On Long Island Sound
Looking for the answer to 13 down
Grand Central Station
The lost and found
Looking for the answer to 13 down

The Wasted Years

Take these things I possess
I know I’ll get by with less
That’s all I’ve learned I guess
Through the wasted years

I don’t know right from wrong
I don’t know weak from strong
Just know I’ve been silent too long
Through the wasted years

My heart just spoke
Like a dam just broke

Torn between east and west
Failing each and every test
Not knowing which direction’s best
Through the wasted years

I called you from Singapore
With feelings you had no use for
Hear the echo of that closing door
Through the wasted years

My heart just spoke
Like a dam just broke
My heart just spoke

Living like a weekend guest
Guessing where I’d come to rest
All my mail arrived addressed
To the wasted years

I have seen the other side
Where the broken hearts collide
God knows what kept me whole inside
Through the wasted years
I have seen the other side
Where the broken hearts collide
God knows what kept me whole inside
Through the wasted years
Through the wasted years

Empire Days

He never left the house without his hat
It’s funny how I should remember that
He smoked he drank but didn’t speak
He put his faith in the football pools each week
He was a man of habit
A man of quiet ways
A man like all the children of empire days

He kept his thoughts safe inside his head
Of friends and fallen comrades long since dead
He fought his wars he more than paid the price
On his way to heaven he saw hell twice
He was a man of habit
A man of quiet ways
A man like all the children of empire days

He was my mother’s father
He was my cornerstone
My empire didn’t really fall
Till he left us all alone
He was a man of habit
A man of quiet ways
A man like all the children of empire days

Men like him had eyes that saw too far
So they settled for the view from the end of the bar
They were men whose fathers’ heads were filled
With an empire that we had no right to build
He was a man of habit
A man of quiet ways
A man like all the children of empire days

Nowhere Near The Sea

Tonight I hear the waves but I’m nowhere near the sea
The ocean that I hear is the one inside of me
The eyes are looking forward but the heart keeps looking back
It gets so hard to care now to bother keeping track
To bother keeping track
There was a time
I would have fought every man for you
Now it seems
My fighting days are through

Words are only words but we turn them into gifts
Then we seem confused as their meaning slowly shifts
I don’t want you thinking this is easy for me to say
That I’m playing with words in my usual way
In my usual way

You’re the kind of woman all men hope to find
But we will always lose you first your body then your mind
I won’t say I’m lucky but I know sometimes I am
There are times I feel too much and times I don’t give a damn
I don’t give a damn
There was a time
I would have fought every man for you
Now it seems
My fighting days are through

The bottle is half empty but the glass is still half full
The axe I’m told is falling but the blade is old and dull
Tonight I hear the waves but I’m nowhere near the sea
The ocean that I hear is the one inside of me
The one inside of me

When All Else Fails

Turn to me when all else fails
I’m your train still in the station
Your ship before it sails
Turn to me when all else fails

Night will fall
It has no choice
There’s always pain
Inside the voice
That speaks to us of failure
Speaks to us of loss
Talking like a preacher
With his fingers crossed
Turn to me when all else fails
I’m your train still in the station
Your ship before it sails
Turn to me when all else fails

Kiss goodbye
To what you hold dear
It’s time to face
Your darkest fear
Recognize the question
In everything you hear
Recognize the distance
In what you thought was near
Turn to me when all else fails
I’m your train still in the station
Your ship before it sails
Turn to me when all else fails

I wear your heart
I bear your name
In time we saw
We’re just the same
God has never spoken
To you or me I know
And if he did well all he said
Was ‘time for you to go’
Turn to me when all else fails
I’m your train still in the station
Your ship before it sails
Turn to me when all else fails

Halfway Home

I’m like a young man
I’m like a young man
Running in an old man’s shoes
In this race I know we all lose

Young girl once said to me
Young girl once said to me
You too will soon grow old
From that day to this I’ve done what I was told

I know what I’m running from
I know what I’m running from
But I don’t know what I’m running to
Heaven’s vague reward’s not for me and you

We’re out here halfway home
We’re out here halfway home
Out where the four winds blow
Are we headed north or south I don’t know

Sometimes we cannot see
Sometimes we cannot see
I was carrying the weight of pride
Back in the days before my father died

You are my final love
You are my final love
You own what’s left of me
I wish I’d saved you more of what I used to be

We’re out here halfway home
We’re out here halfway home
Out where the four winds blow
Are we headed north or south I don’t know

Cowboy Child (For Mackenzie Thorpe)

A cowboy child ruled the plains
Rode on through burning sun
Through driving wind and rains
A cowboy child with his gun
Bullets without bleeding
Death was all part of the fun

Between the black row houses
This spirit running wild
Just another North of England cowboy child

Dreams so full of far away
Proud and weathered faces
And the magic words they say
The Odeon on Saturday
Images and stories
For days and days more play

Between the black row houses
This spirit running wild
Just another North of England cowboy child

The end of day is coming on
The horse and its pale rider
Have traveled far and long
A cowboy child his dream complete
His six-gun silent now
Walks back along High Street

Between the black row houses
This spirit running wild
Just another North of England cowboy child

Nottingham Lace (For Alan Sillitoe)

The factory gates at ten
He has to wait till then
To see her face again
He reminds himself what women are for
Reminds himself she’s just one more

The local boys are loud
The late night drinking crowd
They are both lost and proud
She dare not hope for the kind of love
The kind that she’s been dreaming of

But he won’t be there with her
Won’t be his name she’ll call
He won’t be the one to make her fall
He won’t be there with her after all
England 1938
Too late for dreams my love too late
England 1939
She holds her breath and draws a line

The sky is purple black
Except the tracer tracks
No one to watch his back
He says the little prayer that fuels the flame
And somewhere in it is her name

Crewe Junction rattled by
His heart was low but high
Not the first man to cry
Not for all the things he’d had to do
His tears were for himself for coming through

And he believed when he saw her face
Love was made of Nottingham lace
And he believed when he saw her face
Love was made of Nottingham lace

Journey To Your Heart

Somewhere back in England that’s where I left it all
So many crude rehearsals of my final fall
But when it came it wasn’t the expected fall from grace
I simply fell in love with an unexpected face
I had no way of knowing back there at the start
The journey I was taking was a journey to your heart

Everything and everybody I saw as something I
Had to stand and fight without ever asking why
I guess it was my nature I was born with a grudge
I was pushing back at history but history would not budge
I could not understand even pain had its part
Pushing me so slowly on my journey to your heart

Time is beyond knowing there is no master plan
There is just the distance from the woman to the man
The miles that must be covered the space that must be filled
The bonds that must be broken the fear that must be killed
Many times I wondered if you my counterpart
Knew that I was taking my journey to your heart

You can see the mind still working you can hear the heart reload
As we walk hand in hand along this smoky road
I am doing things that I never thought I’d do
Things I’d not imagined ’cause I’d not imagined you
The blues are packed and ready waiting to depart
They’re wishing me good luck on my journey to your heart

Now every stolen summer I watch your skin turn brown
Every winter fall and spring fate can send around
I wonder how I found you in this spinning world of grief
I feel like a fake I feel like a thief
When you throw me to the wind like a paper dart
Content to never finish my journey to your heart

Phoenix

I’m hungry as a river
And tired as the moon tonight
I’m hungry as a river
And tired as the moon tonight
Don’t take my words to heart I’m too tired to fight

Every day I wake up
With a tiredness that sleep won’t heal
Every day I wake up
With a tiredness that sleep won’t heal
I’ve forgotten how to show my feelings forgotten how to feel

Wherever I am living
I always want to be some other place
Wherever I am living
I always want to be some other place
Sometimes I want to disappear without a trace

Somewhere in between
An English autumn and New York
Somewhere in between
An English autumn and New York
I lost my soul to the moon and reckless talk

I watched her from a distance
Change her god and change her face
I watched her from a distance
Change her god and change her face
The one I loved for all those years in that distant place

Her Chinese eyes are lethal
They can look into my soul
Her Chinese eyes are lethal
They can look into my soul
The Phoenix rising now to make these pieces whole

In the darkness of your sleeping
In the short death of your night
In the darkness of your sleeping
In the short death of your night
You’ll hear the sound of one eye weeping but I’m all right

America

One mile wide
But one inch deep
Pray your lord
Its soul to keep
America is fast asleep

As we sow
So shall we reap
Faith is blind
But still we leap
America is fast asleep

No forgiveness in her heart
Nowhere else for us to start
America

Sirens wail
And cell phones beep
Washington
And Lincoln weep
America is fast asleep

Raised In Vain

Raised in vain to go no higher
Ashes waiting for the fire
Lies in wait for the liar
My voice and I
All that remain
Raised in vain

The young heart beats
The old heart sighs
Life becomes a thin veneer
The old bequeath
The young the prize
Of everything we’re leaving here

Raised in vain to go no higher
Ashes waiting for the fire
Lies in wait for the liar
My voice and I
All that remain
Raised in vain

The lover once
Laid out his plan
She held him close to make it real
She taught him how
To be a man
But could not teach him how to feel

Raised in vain to go no higher
Ashes waiting for the fire
Lies in wait for the liar
My voice and I
All that remain
Raised in vain

John

So this how we all grow old
Not by days
Or years

We drip like blood
From bullet holes
We fall like tears, John

Afterthought

All Things Being Equal

“You’re living for nothing now
I hope you’re keeping some kind of record.” *
                                   – Leonard Cohen

I wish I’d kept a record like Leonard said I should
Memories are disappearing islands in a flood
All things being equal
Which of course they never are
Love would fall upon us all
And never leave a scar

I wish I’d kept a secret from my selfish heart
It was working on an ending from the very start
All things being equal
Which of course they never are
You’d still be here with me
It would not have gone this far

Smoke curled from your lips
Like a soul leaving the earth
I can tell you now you were the one
Whatever that is worth

I wish I’d kept you guessing instead of giving it away
I wish I’d learned to listen instead of learning what to say
All things being equal
Which of course they never are
Love would be a mystery
A wish upon a star

I wish I’d kept a record like Leonard said I should
Memories are disappearing islands in a flood
All things being equal
Which of course they never are
Love would fall upon us all
And never leave a scar

* Lines from ‘Famous Blue Raincoat’ by Leonard Cohen.
Used with his kind permission.

The Truth

The only one you wanted was the one who was not there
This is how you came to me with riddles in your hair
As I tried to solve them you laughed without a care
I unwound all your secrets in a hotel room somewhere
But morning shuffled in and they withered in its stare
Your dreams were standing naked your ambitions standing bare
And I faced the final question – were you ever really there

Just close your eyes
And I’ll disappear
It’ll be just like
I was never here
No need to trick the heart with lies
Just close your eyes

The truth is in the way you hardly look at me
The truth is in the way we seldom touch
I have loved you from the first time that you walked into my life
But I know you never loved me quite as much

Just close your eyes
And I’ll disappear
It’ll be just like
I was never here
No need to trick the heart with lies
Just close your eyes

The truth is in the way you brush your golden hair
The truth is counted by those needs denied
Sacred preparations for the man who isn’t there
For the one who is – just distance multiplied

Just close your eyes
And I’ll disappear
It’ll be just like
I was never here
No need to trick the heart with lies
Just close your eyes

Jaded Heart

There’s a fog out on the Bay
Just the same as yesterday
All surprises here are self-imposed
If this city were a lover
You would find under the cover
Her golden arms are open
But her jaded heart is closed

There’s a fog out on the Bay
Just the same as yesterday
But it’s 1966 still down on Haight
In the Valley it’s ’97
That was their idea of heaven
For both the end came early
With lessons learned too late

There’s the City of Brotherly Love
And the City That Never Sleeps
Every night this city crawls
Beneath the sheets
And weeps…

There’s a fog out on the Bay
Just the same as yesterday
There’s a new philosopher in every bar
Disciples make their pledge
To the shifting leading edge
Believing that the future is
Nowhere but where they are

There’s a fog out on the Bay
Just the same as yesterday
All surprises here are self-imposed
If this city were a lover
You would find under the cover
Her golden arms are open
But her jaded heart is closed

More By Luck Than Judgment

We’ve come so far
We’ll go farther still
We’ll take the strain
We’ll climb that hill
We’ll break the borders
We’ll cross the lines
Face whatever time designs
And more by luck than judgment
We’ll make it to the end my friend

We never knew
What was in our fate
We just had to move
It was getting late
We took the gamble
We took the chance
Changed our partners for the final dance
And more by luck than judgment
We’ll make it to the end my friend

May the luck of the devil be with you
He’s as good as a friend can get
We’ve been waiting for his counterpart
But he ain’t shown up yet

We know the truth
Or something close to it
We know the pieces
Don’t always fit
We know the reasons
We now the rhymes
We know we live in interesting times
And more by luck than judgment
We’ll make it to the end my friend

May the luck of the devil be with you
He’s as good as a friend can get
We’ve been waiting for his counterpart
But he ain’t shown up yet

And more by luck than judgment
We’ll make it to the end my friend

White Tiles (For Wesley)

Once upon a time
In a bar down in Brazil
We sat and talked all night
Our ghosts are talking still
I talked about the women
You talked about the men
I think you knew already
We’d never talk like this again

Once upon a time
Once upon a time

In Soho there’s a kitchen
With names upon the walls
A new white tile is added
For every one who falls
I’d like to make a journey
Perhaps one day I will
And hang your tile in the corner
Of that bar down in Brazil

Once upon a time
Once upon a time

Deep Salvage


Music by Jeff Shattuck, words by Dave Tutin

The Forgotten Place

There’s a need that burns
Like a forest fire
Scattering the casualties of my desire
In love and loss
In flood or drought
All the seeds I’ve scattered were just seeds of doubt

From Hong Kong to London
From Bangkok to Rome
From New York to Rio
To a forgotten place called home

Sparks and wind
And a fire starts
The ecstasy of every
Collision of hearts

From Berlin to Cape Town
From Bangkok to Rome
From Singapore to Paris
To a forgotten place called home

But there’s a fire still burning
And that wall of flame
Stops you from returning
The way you came

With their mother’s ghost
Still between the sheets
My imaginary children walk the streets

From Hong Kong to London
From Bangkok to Rome
From New York City
To a forgotten place called home

Borderline Love

You say you’re leaving
That things just don’t seem right
You blame my past
You blame my appetite
But there’s fire in your eyes as you head for the door…

Like me you want more
Like me you want more
Like me you want more
Of this borderline love

You say you’re leaving
I always thought you would
And to lie to you now
Would simply do no good
And there’s one thing that I know for sure as you head for the door…

Like me you want more
Like me you want more
Like me you want more
Of this borderline love

I was never quite yours
You were never quite mine
We were living
we were loving
on the borderline

And there’s one thing that I know for sure as you head for the door…

Like me you want more
Like me you want more
Like me you want more
Of this borderline love

Waitress Blues

“I went home with the waitress
the way I always do…” – Warren Zevon

Well…the coffee was cold
But the waitress was hot
And I could say where I was
But I would rather not
Some things it’s just better
To try to forget
But as hard as a I try
I’ve not forgotten yet

That the coffee was cold
But the waitress was hot
I could say where I was
But I would rather not

I could name the town
But that would not be wise
The memory plays tricks
And it likes telling lies
With an old song’s words
Ringing in my head
I let the dark-eyed waitress
Take me home to her bed

I could name the town
But that would not be wise
‘cause the memory plays tricks
And it likes telling lies

In the morning I head
For god-knows-where
With my heart and my body
In need of repair
With her scent on my skin
And her voice in my head
And my youth left dying
On her unmade bed

And in the morning I head
For god-knows-where
With my heart and my body
In need of repair

The coffee was cold
But the waitress was hot
And I could say where I was
But I would rather….

Easier Said Than Done

All my needs are gathered here
In the open loud and clear
Finally revealed by what you’ve done
Views of you inside my head
In my arms and in my bed
Memories of moments lost and won

Loving you is easy
I have no doubt you’re the one
It’s just that loving you – that’s easier said than done

I chased shadows found your smile
Somewhere I could rest a while
I chased the moon and found the sun
But your heart could not be tamed
Could not be tied could not be named
As quickly as you came you were gone

Loving you is easy
And I have no doubt you’re the one
It’s just that loving you – that’s easier said than done

And how did I get here
With love caving in to fear

And if you take a picture of me
You’ll see everything I swore I’d never be

And loving you is easy
I have no doubt you’re the one
It’s just that loving you – that’s easier said than done
Yes and loving you is easier said than done